Jam, glam and a hot goddamn
Tryin’ to put the steam back in an old steam ram
Stokin’ up the boiler, squirtin’ through the oiler
Jigglin’ the rust from the old jammed cam
Heat up the hinge, watch it doesn’t singe
Flame starts to flicker
In the pecker and the ticker
Half a league onward and it’s out on the binge.
Steamin’ through the weeks, the troughs and the peaks
Up a bit, up a bit
Fillin’ up the cup a bit
Bringin’ back the colour to the floppy old cheeks.
Start it
Stop it
Pick it up and drop it.
Oh oh
Oh
OH!
Step through the door and just let go.
And it’s here! Where? Just down there!
It’s got a head of pressure and it’s comin’ up for air.
It’s gettin’ out of hand!
Strike up the band!
Just a lick of paint
(Don’t it look quaint?)
Take a quick shot of it
The whole damn lot of it
Tie on the flag
Pop it in a bag
Feeling like new for you, Iíve really gotta shout –
Thank you, thank you
(How I’d love to spank you)
Sorry ’bout the last line†- it just slipped out.